Celebrity Proust Questionnaire: Tiffiny Mackey Fisher
Today’s answers come from longtime reader Tiffiny Mackey Fisher, who’s been my friend since we tap danced together in 2nd grade (and, in hindsight, wore inappropriate saloon girl costumes to dance to “Hippy Hippy Shake??). We also spent several years together in the Nerd Classroom, also known as Gifted and Talented.
1.) What is your name, occupation, website (if applicable)?
Tiffiny Fisher
Data Analyst (sexy, I know)
@elliephant1209 via the Twitter
2.) What is your first memory of being drawn to a star or celebrity?
I remember being obsessed with the royals even when I was really young. My grandparents owned a law office and one of the reception area magazines they’d pass down to me was People, and I was fascinated by Princess Diana and her life played out on the People covers. I even had these fancy-pants Prince Charles and Princess Diana paper dolls that I would spend hours playing with at my grandparents’ house. When she died, I cried for hours. And I’m still hopeful that I could talk Prince Harry into being a brother-husband to my current one.
3.) Who are your heroes of contemporary celebritude, and why?
I think the Brange plays the game well. They know their brand and they sell it to the max.
4.) Who are your favorite participants, broadly speaking, in the history of stardom, and why?
Elizabeth Taylor is the Queen of Stardom. I don’t think there is anyone that can come close. Her entire life is fodder of the highest order for gossip and speculation. Also, she has violet eyes! Violet! No one else has ever had purple eyes, come on.
5.) You can only be best friends with one person in all of celebritude, past and present. Who? How did you two meet? What’s your favorite thing to do together?
I don’t know that I would want a celebrity as a best friend. I don’t do well with insecure narcissists. But if I had to pick, I’d choose Emily Blunt. She seems pretty cool and we could lunch like ladies and maybe I could make her laugh at my semi-horrible English accent.
6.) You can only date on person in all of celebritude, past and present. Who? Where would you first date be? What would he/she get you for your birthday?
John Cusack, circa Say Anything. We would reenact all the romantic scenes from that movie, leaving out all the angst and creepy thieving father stuff. He’d get me a dozen Sprinkles cupcakes and we would eat them at the park together with some pink Prosecco and he’d laugh at all my jokes, even the really lame puns that no one in their right mind would find truly funny.
I gave you my heart, and you gave me a pen!
7.) Who do you regard as the lowest depth of celebritude?
Anyone that is photographed in public wearing Lucite heels. I’m talking to you, Shauna Sand. And Phoebe Price. And Heidi Montag.
8.) Name a celebrity that is
a.) Overrated: Lindsay Lohan and the rest of the Lohans. JUST GO AWAY.
b.) Underrated: Taylor Kitsch. I need more of him. A lot more.
c.) Appropriately rated: Is there such a thing? I guess James McAvoy. He only comes to play when he’s promoting a movie and I miss him when he goes away.
9.) What is your favorite celebrity nickname and/or celebrity culture-related slang? (e.g. “Manslinger” for Kate Hudson)
I’ve always loved The Brange for Brad and Angelina. Also, when Lainey first pointed out Miley’s beat-me mouth, I actually laughed aloud. Such a perfect descriptor for it.
10.) What is the greatest/most bombastic moment of celebrity ever? (Example: A-Rod posing for a photo shoot as a centaur)
Oh, Annie, must you remind me that my long-time athlete crush did that? Gah. Anyway, I don’t know that you can top Tom Cruise jumping on a couch and acting a fool on Oprah. It was crazy on a whole new level. Also, MJ’s dancing on a car outside the courthouse during his first (second?) molestation trial to throngs of admirers. I mean, holy crap.
11.) Where do you get gossip on your celebrities of interest? Explain more?
LaineyGossip, Go Fug Yourself, DListed, Gawker, Deadspin (excellent sports gossip). Basically, if it’s snarky, witty gossip, I’m on board.
12.) How do celebrities and stardom relate to your own work/extra-work activites?
In my work life, it’s how I look busy on days when I’m not. Outside of work, it’s my primary hobby. The lives of the rich and famous are total escapism for me. Like Posh and her endless supply of Birkins. I know how much a base-model Birkin costs…it blows my mind that she can afford so many – and highly custom ones at that. Because you know Hermes doesn’t give their stuff away free for publicity.
13.) Why is celebrity culture — and our attention, analysis, and discussion of it — important?
For some people, celebrity is aspirational. And for others (like me) it’s a cautionary tale. Either way, talking about celebrities is a way to connect with those around you. Nearly everyone has a take on celebrity and the people that inhabit that world. To discuss and debate and gawk at them is to find a common interest between yourself and say, the 50-year-old grandmother at the grocery store when you both are rifling through the latest US Weekly or People. It’s oddly comforting.
